Purity

On my way back home in the bus, i had this weird sensation. Of purity. As if i were rubbed clean of everything. As if there was nothing left in me but just beauty and joy. I felt washed out, tired, drained, but at peace and pure. It felt as if that touch had purified me. As if that little nap of sleep were under the eyes of an angel.


Here's a completely disjoint thing, but i'd rather write it in the same post. There's a connection i can't put down in words.

Its weird how I connect to people. Not that i understand any of these complex relationships, but i form a special bond with people I'm not trying to sound pompous here. NO, i'm not saying i'm special in the sense of being close to someone. In fact, i make no claims about being very close to my friends, with a few exceptions. Special in the sense of something different and rare.  I mean, no one comes up to me and does random timepass. No one acts touchie feelie with me (Yes, there's this annoying species of girls, who act giggly and weird, letting people run away with their ... ahem... hair accessories etc and then they'll sit and shout about it, happily albeit. Dumb Eagle would know what i mean.) But i do not belong to this genre, and no one plays around that way with me. Not to say that i'm serious in my dealings with my friends. We have lots of fun, a lot more than the species i talked of, but all of it has an element of respect. There's a decorum and there's still a lot of fun.

Coming back to the chain of events that triggered these words. I'd worn an old silk kurta to college today. Apparently a lot of people found that attractive and complemented me on it. A friend, whom we shall call The Bear :P, was one such man. He's pretty harmless and nice generally, but  today he acted ...ahem... shall we say, not harmless? I mean, sometimes its weird to know how easily can someone be affected, just my appearances. Felt weird, to see a guy i knew falling for such a flimsy thing. I mean, three years of seeing each other everyday and working together, (i thought) gets you used to each other, irrespective of how-do-i-look, how-cute-am-i etc. I know i'm getting int a rant, but i'm looking for the perfect expression to what i feel.

Maybe i could put it this way.

I thought all my friends must be used to me by now, as i said, these are people i've met everyday in college, they must have seen me in the worst-hair-days, the-grumpy-moods-days, the world-is-beautiful-days etc. And there's a strict point beyond which i do not encourage interactions/interference, as i said, some respect on both sides. But it was surprising to see The Bear reacting to visibly and expressively today. For a flimsy reason like this. I'm not isolating him, there were a lot of people who said the same thing today, but he just ...well.. surprised me. 

This might be incoherent, but it fits like the perfect puzzle into my mind.
I understand now, after writing it.